Happy Friggin' Thanksgiving

From: ledoux67@aol.com
To: christyswims@yahoo.com
Date: 11/22/2007 11:10:51 A.M. Eastern Standard Time
Subject: Happy Friggin Thanksgiving.

Hi Christy! How are you? Happy Thanksgiving! Just wanted to take a moment from my busy morning to send you a quick email and tell you that unless Brian shuts his mother up and takes his daughter out someplace deep in the woods for about the next two hours, I AM GOING TO KILL THEM!!!! AND I WILL BE THANKFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let me say this in as big and bold a type as I can:

IF LAURA KNOWS HOW TO PREPARE THE FN BIRD SO EXPERTLY, THEN WHY DOESN'T SHE DO IT HERSELF????!!!!! ANSWER: BECAUSE IT'S MORE FUN TO FN HOVER OVER HER DAUGHTER IN LAW AND TELL ME HOW TO DO IT, WHAT I'M DOING WRONG AND HOW SHE DOES IT, WHAT BRILLIANT IDEAS SHE SAW ON FOOD NETWORK THAT WE SHOULD TRY!!!! etc etc etc etc

AGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

This is not flippin ROCKET SCIENCE Christy... it's an fn turkey. SPG on the skin, garlic butter baste... about a half hour at 450 then cover it and turn the temp back and cook 20 minutes per pound.

I should of let Brian do it but he and Danny are cutting wood, not that we'll need it, seeing as its 60 degrees out.

I should go cut wood and let THEM deal with her.

So how's YOUR day going lmaaao?

See, but you and Marty are smart: you live at a distance, then come down for the grand holiday tour and let everyone else run the show. WE had to build a cozy wilderness getaway with a 3500 square foot dining room and a kitchen with f'n crematory temperature ovens. So we're always the ones to host, which would be fine if we could just be LEFT ALONE TO HOST... but everyone who comes here "feels bad that we always have thanksgiving, that we always have Christmas, that we do all the work" and I know they mean well but PLEASE GO OUT AND SIT AND WATCH THE PARADES WITH THE KIDS!!!!!

At least MOM will be here soon (11:30) to help me deflect some of this tension... she gets on my nerves when I'm cooking too but at least we can bark at each other en francais, and then we'll start laughing and it'll be cool, and that will get Laura to lighten up. God knows she could never have a glass of wine before 3 pm.

It's all Brian's fault. He said "Come on out for breakfast and you can help." I heard him, and yet I allowed it.

I guess I need to make a list of things Laura can do to help: Watch Becca. Walk outside and inspect the gutters. Go up the driveway and make sure the road is still there. Etc etc.

I can't wait to mash potatoes.

By hand.

With my fist.

Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr... xoxo me

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